Should Men Still Open Doors for Women?

I’m sorry I’m so slow on getting back to the conversation of chivalry, and I also know I’m not been really good at staying focused on my sand bucket list, a list of things I want to do with my kids before I grow up. If you’re looking for a blog where projects actually get done, this may not be the right place for you.

Think about it this way though.  Wouldn’t you rather read a blogger who accomplishes less than you do?  Hey, I’m happy to help.

Believe it or not, I’m really trying to get some focus here and one of the items on my sand bucket list is to get my boys to open doors for me and other lovely ladies.  When I hear of girls that say they don’t need their doors opened for them, I wonder if they understand what they are really saying.   Some mother out there has spent years training that boy to open the door for the girl, and she undoes all of that training with one rejection.

Footloose and Fancy Free.  Twenty years ago.  
Not that I don’t get what they’re saying.  When I was young and single, I was completely capable of running around on my own.   I went on a Vienna study abroad trip in college and had no problem getting around the city on the U-Bahn, attending Haydn symphonies solo, and following an Italian to his flat just because he promised a grand piano.  Don’t worry mom.  I was a good girl.  One of my fellow students said I must have had an entire army of guardian angels watching over me, and now that I think about it, she was probably right. 
I hope to go to Germany again next year to see my sister Mindy! 
Anyway, things change when you get married and have children.  The reason you need the door opened for you is because you’re pushing a stroller, bouncing a screaming baby, and fishing around in your diaper bag for some Benadryl.  
I learned just how helpless I was when I decided to go to St. George sans the captain.  There was a large family reunion going on, but he had to work.  I’m not one to miss out on the fun and so my mom and several of us sisters went in on a condo.  There wasn’t a man in sight, and it was insane. 
For one, there were kids everywhere in our condo.  Even worse, most of them were mine. They were always under my feet, crying or hungry or asking me to find their swimming suits.  Like I should know where their swimming suits were.  
Sure he’s cute, but he’was a lot of work on that trip.   
Going out to the pool may be fun when you’re young and single, but when you’re a mom it means swim diapers, sun screen, life jackets, diaper wipes, sun hats, floaties, goggles, fruit snacks, ear plugs, and juice boxes, and that is just no way I can keep all that straight.  Worst of all, I had to actually get in the swimming pool with my kids and all the other dads while the women laid out and read their books.  
Me and my gorgeous cousin.  If she’s looking high energy, that’s because her husband came on the trip.

When the one car we were all using broke down, that was it.  “We need a man!”  I yelled.  “Now!”  I kept saying it over and over again, and it became a sort of mantra for me, but the captain never showed up. Maybe I should have called him since my attempts at telepathy obviously weren’t working.   
Don’t get me wrong.  I’m so nuts about my kids.  Dennis said to me today, “Mom, I have an idea.  What don’t we just hang out all day together tomorrow?”  That just melted my heart, and I completely plan on taking him up on it.  But I was in over my head on that trip, and I’ve learned not to take my husband for granted.  
I don’t mean to sound insensitive to you mothers who are doing it all without a good man behind you.  You are absolutely amazing and so strong.   But I still believe that it’s best to teach boys at a young age to open doors for girls.  It teaches them to be more aware of what’s going on around them and to be more thoughtful, and believe me.  There’s a lot of boys out there that haven’t learned these skills yet.  
When I struggled to open the door at Gymboree, stroller in hand, only to have my six year old son push ahead of me, you better believe I set him straight.  He’s now opened his first door for a lady. 
On the other hand, I recently went to Costco and the boy that helped us out kept saying, “Oh don’t lift that.  That’s too heavy for you.  Let me get that.”  I wanted to ask him who he thought was going to unload the stuff when I got home, but I smiled at him and said “thank you.”  He was so sweet about it, and I was tired.  If you want me to set him up with you, let me know.  
What do you think boys ought to learn to do for girls when they are young?  

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