Our Family Résumé
- David: Lends money to people that are already rich; winds up boys that are already hyper.
- Rebekah: Serves 21 meals, administers 47 timeouts, washes 15 loads of laundry, reads 9 children’s books, sweeps 18 times, and yells 0 times on a weekly basis.
- Benjamin: Helps kindergarten teacher quiet down class.
- Eli: Lies around.
- Baby David: Dances on dishwasher door, grabs unattended knives, and attempts to sticks metallic objects in electrical outlets.
- David: Graduated from UCLA’s School of Business. June 2004
- Rebekah: Underwent vigorous retraining program. Studied the following books: Getting Organized, The Strong-Willed Child, Is There Life After Housework? and her favorite, Who Says It’s a Woman’s Job to Clean?
- Ben: Four months of kindergarten.
- Eli: Should be in preschool (but his Mom loves his pleasantness at home).
- Baby David: If only he could be in preschool.
- David: Played basketball with a former BYU player.
- Rebekah: Hosted French and Mexican cooking parties. Convinced friends to do the cooking.
- Ben: Ate nine pancakes with maple syrup.
- Eli: Has not been mistaken for a rug—yet. Unloaded dishwasher when his food supply was threatened.
- David: Is still alive. Learned how to scowl.
Experiences (Only Good Ones of Course)
- Bought a new home in the East Bay from generous friends.
- Camped at Pismo Beach and ate the world’s best clam chowder.
- Biked through San Francisco and drank hot chocolate at Ghirardelli square.
- Saw dolphins near Malibu beach and later in Monterey .
- Hiked around Lake Anza and baby stayed in daddy’s backpack.
- Challenging experiences will be provided upon request.